--------------------
paano bang inaabot ang lalim ng lungkot?
anim na talampakang ayaw magpaabot
saang araw makikiusap
hihiram ng init at liwanag

puting tuldok
tanda sa dulo ng makipot na daan
natatanaw man
hindi naman malakaran

ulang bumubuhos
umaagos papalayo
pakiusap: anurin, dalhin
itong bigat ng damdmin

------------------------
mula sa aking baul...




Nais kong di ka umimik: na parang di ka narito
At marinig mo ako mula sa malayo at ang tinig ko’y di ka maabot
Para bang ang mga mata mo’y lumipad papalayo
At parang isang halik ang nagtupi ng iyong bibig

Kung paanong ang lahat ng bagay ay puno ng aking kaluluwa
Ikaw ay nagmumula sa mga bagay, puno ng aking kaluluwa
Paruparo ng guni-guni, tulad ka ng aking kaluluwa
At katulad ka ng salitang -- lumbay

Nais kong di ka umimik, at mukha ka ngang malayo
Para bang ika’y nanaghoy, isang paruparo, humuhuning parang ibon
At narinig mo ako sa malayo, at ang tinig ko di ka maabot:
Hayaan mo akong lumapit at di umimik kasama ng iyong katahimikan

At hayaan mo akong kausapin ka sa iyong pananahimik
Na sing-liwanag ng gasera, payak tulad ng singsing.
Tulad ka ng gabi, ng mga konstelasyong walang kibo
Ang iyong pananahimik parang bituin, malayo at walang tinatago

Nais kong di ka umimik: na parang di ka narito
Malayo at labis ang lungkot na para bang ikaw ay namatay
Kaya isang salita lang, isang ngiti, tama na.
At ako’y masaya, masayang hindi yuon totoo.


SALIN MULA SA TULA NI PABLO NERUDA
6/21/01






I LIKE FOR YOU TO BE STILL
Pablo Neruda


I like for you to be still
It is as though you were absent
And you hear me from far away
And my voice does not touch you
It seems that your eyes have flown away
And a kiss has sealed your mouth
As all things are filled with my soul
You emerge from the things filled with my soul
You are like my soul
A butterfly of dream
And you are like the word — melancholy

I like for you to be still
And you seemed far away
It sounds as though you were lamenting
A butterfly cooing like a dove
And you hear me from far away
And my voice does not reach you
Let me come to be still in your in silence
And let me talk to you with your silence
That is bright as a lamp, simple as a ring
You are like the night
With its stillness and constellations
Your silence is that of a star
As remote and candid

I’d like for you to be still
It is as though you were absent
Distant and full of sorrow
As though you had died
One word then, one smile is enough
And I’m happy, happy that it’s not true.


TRANSCRIBED FROM "IL POSTINO"
OST BY MIRAMAX MOTION PICTURE

------------------------

another day
another difficult day of counting my blessings
tomorrow
another day
one i hope i won't be starting off again
cursing a set of returned vouchers
and the f-of-a-word bureaucratic system that goes with it

-------------------------

can u believe this crap?
...MWAHAHAHAHAHA!!!


On a scale of 1 to 10 you are a 7. You are
obviously evil and there are not very many that
are in your league. You belong behind bars to
keep the general population safe from you.
Unfortunitly as crafty as you are this will
probably not happen until many lives have been
destroyed.
To improve your level of evil and become a
Vampire
CLICK HERE to join the game.



How Evil Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

---------------------


sabi ko na nga ba e :)

My inner child is ten years old!

The adult world is pretty irrelevant to me. Whether
I'm off on my bicycle (or pony) exploring, lost
in a good book, or giggling with my best
friend, I live in a world apart, one full of
adventure and wonder and other stuff adults
don't understand.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

------------------------------------
hey, have u heard?
today's the 100th day before Krismas!!!

but guess what i've been thinking
and which many friends reminded me of today?


d e a t h

if i stare long enough at it
that 5-letter word won't seem to mean a thing
and so i hope
but then we all concerned parties know that
it will still do



was talking with zeny about our mothers,
their similarities -- ugali, charm, sickness, their deaths
of us missing them even after all these years
and then thinking what it would be like when our similar time comes

later this evening a young friend told me he almost got killed on the road last week
slowing down before he even knew something's gonna hit him saved him

then opening my email,
i was reminded to ask what to me matters?
really matters

yesterday my greatest thought for the day was:
hope i'd be dead by the end of the day
that would mean no more work to get pissed over


but then like in all other matters,
no such luck
:)


still here
looking over there
to where i believe
things would be better
where people who mean to me would be waiting


but for now
for here
to keep my thoughts of death company
to make it something beautiful
something to look forward to as much as
this we call "haaayyy buhay"

i choose this


i w i l l b e g r a t e f u l


for every single day
for every single (even if coupled) person
for every single me (the very, very single me)
and my life
and my would-be death


dahil gusto ko
pag tinatanong na ako
yung isasagot ko
yun-na-yun
parang si susan...


----------------

SUSAN
Where are you going?

SETH (MAN)
Home.

SUSAN
Can Mommy Come?

SETH
No.

SUSAN
She won't understand.

SETH
She will, someday.

He holds out his hand. She takes it. He leads her away, as the edges of what is familiar in the hospital corridor become fuzzy, suffused with light. . .

SETH
Can I ask you something?

SUSAN
Yes.

SETH
What did you like best?

SUSAN
(thinking)
Pajamas.



-------------------------
1998 city of angels
1998 nanay
1998 j

----------------------------------------------------------------
i almost passed up this time to post something for today
how could i?
it's a FOOLMOON night!!!!

though sad still to remember the significance of today's number ...

in a little while
i'm going to the launch of joey ayala's love song album
heard it's quite a collection
(well i've got my album collection, collecting dust...
love collection??? hmmm---next item please)

in a little while, i'll be walking home
alone
marveling at the moon again

" hi MOON... "
i'd say as i've said before for not less than 59 times

and then would go missing two people
one who was as foolish as that sphere hanging so far away
one who was as beautiful as the light that travels to visit so silently

but both so loved
so missed still

foolish love songs
on a full moon

mine
and theirs


for nanay & j

from wherever spot you both are
hope you get to listen to them
and hear my foolishness loving you still

-------------------
i need to silence duncan for a while
my fingers been itching to update my blog
but for some reason now
i can't seem to rack my brains enough
to come up with something worthy of the white page

electronic ink blot...
spread this way and that...
more ink blot...

ah!
today, i got to show tintin some poems i made
on that particularly productive and
creatively schmultzy (?) day of august 16

i'm still wringing out from her some true blue literary critique
well she's my friend--hello friend :)
she would have to come up with something
tough job

you see
i've been the type of person
who way way back in shool
gets disturbed
when there are no other markings on my submitted papers
except one of those general ratings

i always thought that meant
"there was nothing much to notice"
red marks would have meant
"evocative"
whether positive or negative

well time machine to today
at least for one of those i wrote
this one she liked
and i liked too
back when i was wringing them out of my digestive system..



ON AN ISLAND
ON A WEEKEND'S MORNING
AT A FEW FEET'S PACE
BEAUTY, ACHE, REST
NOISE, UNDERCURRENT, BRIGHT LIGHT
THE SEA'S BREATH AND CREAKING BEDS

I TAKE ALL IN
I TAKE YOU IN
FROM A FEW FEET'S PACE
I TAKE LIFE IN...

5 September 03 * FRI

sabi ng bespren ko sa opis,
ganda raw ng personality quiz na to
(though mejo ilag ako sa mga bagay na sinasabing "ultimate",
parang "intimate" ba?)

heniwey, ito ang resulta...
kinda me nga
but there's also the masokista type na
ilang beses ng ginamit ng aking mga butihing mga kaibigan :)

so tiyagain natin...




Seer


The ULTIMATE personality test
brought to you by Quizilla

1 September 2003

korni. pero meri krismas!

yesterday, i saved this in my fone
"broke and broken-hearted, that's what i am today"

first characters i keyed in in my pc this morning
"broken spirit"

this evening, i chat with a good friend in germany
"now by grace, i come to the end of the day, still broke, still broken-hearted but my spirit smiles at the brokeness"

pasko na nga :)









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